Suppertime Visit

My wife Lori went to visit Mee Maw at supper this evening. I arrived as she finished, having left work early to do so.

Mee Maw was very confused about the time of day. She said several times that she had awakened at 2:48, and she "just knew" that the next meal was breakfast. Imagine her surprise when she was served spaghetti and salad for "breakfast". She insisted that Lori have a plate also, which she did. Lori kept Mee Maw company while she ate and chatted with her and with some of those around her.

Mee Maw insisted on introducing Lori as her daughter-in-law (instead of granddaughter-in-law). She also said that this was Lori's first visit there, which also was not true. When I arrived we walked back down to her room. She stopped at the nurses' station and informed the nurse that she felt like it was after breakfast and that she always had a pain pill after breakfast. "Do you need a pill?" she was asked. "Are you hurting?" "No, I'm all right," said Mee Maw as she began going back down the hall. The nurse offered to come see her later to see if she needed any medication.

I sat with her in her room for almost an hour. Lori left to do some grocery shopping, so we were alone. We talked about a couple of different things, much of it having to do with the time of day and her schedule. I kept repeating to her that she had just had supper and that the next meal was breakfast. We looked over the week's menu several times, and she told me how she is not exactly fond of the food. Then we would repeat a few of the things, such as which day it was, what time of day it was, what the next meal was to be, and so forth. We scanned through the TV channels and briefly watched the local news on one station, but nothing seemed to interest her too much. She decided to read a magazine and apologized to me for making me sit and "twiddle my thumbs". Then she proceeded to ask again which day and what time it was. She also asked about her newspaper, but I had to convince her that the paper would not arrive for another 12 hours or so.

Her level of confusion seems to be deepening. A friend told me last week that her grandmother took almost a year to overcome the effects of general anesthesia. Some have also hinted that this could be a side effect of her light eating habits, or even symptomatic of the tumor in her liver. Whatever it is, it is disconcerting to have to answer the same questions several times in the course of a half-hour.

Her son James brought her dog Dixie for a visit today. She insisted that it had been the previous day. She said the dog seemed to enjoy the visit, especially when she made the rounds of the dining area during lunch.

She had a doctor's visit last week. Her regular doctor suggested that maybe she is not capable of living in an "assisted living" facility and that she should go to a full nursing home. At this point the family is rejecting that option until all other avenues have been tried. As long as she is able to function with help like she has, she should be allowed to live her life as comfortably as possible.

Her comment to me several times this evening was, "I'm so bored!" Maybe if each of us that visits her asks her to give us ideas of things to interest her and occupy her mind and her time, we can help limit or reverse the confusion levels. She mentioned to me that she loves crosswords, but that the puzzles of today are not interesting (too much "pop" culture, I suspect). We are going to look for a Bible crossword puzzle book or two for her during our trip this weekend. Hopefully others will do the same and get her mind active again.

A Visit to the Doctor

This week was a pretty good one. Mee Maw's birthday last weekend went well. Most of the visitors that she had were family members, especially on Saturday. Some others did stop through, but she could not remember all of the names. I think we need to get a journal of some type that visitors can sign to help her (and the rest of us) know who has been by to visit.

The "highlight" of the week, if you can call it that, was a CAT scan done on Thursday. She has been complaining of pain in her side lately. X-rays showed that the colon could possibly be pinched between the ribs and the hip because of her stooped-over posture. There was also some small concern about a possible spot on her lung.

So, she got an appointment to be looked over on Thursday morning. Being the "worry-wart" that she tends to be sometimes, she kept thinking about it and waiting for the time to come. My parent's telephone rang at 3AM Thursday morning. The voice annunciator said in my youngest sister's mellifluous tones, "It's Mee Maw!" My mother answered and heard from the other end, "What time are you coming to pick me up to go to the hospital?" She had to convince Mee Maw that it was 3 o'clock and that she should get back in bed.

This has been a trend of late. One of the nurses recently discovered her sitting at the table in the dining area waiting on breakfast. It was around 3:00. Another time she was sitting in the same place, and the cook came through. "Why are you here, Mrs. Matthews?" she asked. "I'm waiting on breakfast," was the reply. The cook told her that she was just arriving, and that breakfast was not for at least another 30 minutes. Mee Maw chose to sit there and wait for it rather than to go back to her room.

She is getting a lot of sleep. Unfortunately it's during the day, so she awakens early and thinks it's time to begin the day again. Her sons tell her to look out the window to see if it's dark. If the sun isn't up, she is supposed to go back to bed. Hopefully she will start doing that.

Back to the CAT scan: Mee Maw called my folks again Thursday morning at 6:30, wondering what she was supposed to wear. My mother told her that the clothes were all set out and ready to go. "Oh, you mean these?" Mee Maw said.

The scan went OK. Mee Maw commented at the close of the day that she had felt pretty good all day long, with little pain anywhere. That changed on Friday, when she stayed in bed most of the day with pain in her back instead of her side.

Her doctor reported the results of the CAT scan. Apparently the colon is not being pinched like he thought. So we are back to wondering about the cause of the pain. The spot on the lung was evidently just a false indication on the x-ray. However, we are aware of some places on her liver that have been investigated by an specialist in Birmingham. This CAT scan shows that these places are increasing slightly in size. The doctor thinks that maybe these spots are the cause of her discomfort, since the location of the liver corresponds with the location of some of the pain she has been experiencing.

We are all doing our best to keep her spirits up and to encourage her to get involved with the activities at the facility. She goes and plays BINGO sometimes, but only if my mother is there and goes with her. Yesterday my 8-year-old son was with his grandmother and helped with the BINGO game. He actually won one game, too!

Keep her in your thoughts and prayers. Send cards, notes, letters, and stay in contact with her.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

It's Mee Maw's 98th birthday today.

"Happy birthday! We love you a lot!"

Hopefully she will hear that at least 98 times today.